A quick shout out to my girl! (no, the other one)

She's always there when I need her most.
She's always provided for me without question or judgment.
She always keeps it fresh by introducing new and wild things into our relationship.

I'm talking about Wendy's.  I'll keep this one quick (if possible) because this is just a shout of praise.

Years ago, when Fat Mike wasn't so fat living as a starving artist in an apt with a roommate, and holding down 3 jobs, Wendy's was my primary source of sustenance.  She was close by, available whenever I needed her and within my budget.  Better yet, she offered me healthier, better prepared menu options than her clown counterpart, or that deceivingly charming tyrannical alternative.  Over the years, I've stood by her side while the industry assimilated to the criteria listed above and embraced the current menu model.  There have been high points and low over the years, but she always coaxes me back in with special items like a Bacon Mushroom Melt LTO, or a new Spicy Chicken option.  I should note that we've never been mutually exclusive.  I stray on occasion, and I know that she finds joy in serving others besides myself. However, when faced with a choice I find myself knocking on her door knowing she'll welcome me back with open arms.

During a recent family road trip, I found myself in need of a quick food solution, and had an opportunity to reunite with my always reliable lady friend, Wendy.  It felt like coming home, and I was happily surprised to find that she had recently rolled out some new items from the kitchen.

Yep, Wendy decided she wanted to try her hand at some BBQ.  I have to admit that I was a little skeptical of her ability to properly execute this genre of food.  After all, while I've celebrated her unique takes on staples like the burger and the chicken sandwich, when I see items like BBQ Pulled Pok/Chicken Sandwich, or Pulled Pork Cheeseburger I have to hesitate a little bit.

Since I was completely caught off guard, I was in no situation to be diving in to a full blown tasting of the BBQ menu, but I couldn't just let it pass me by. So, I reached for the most obvious way to properly judge the execution: BBQ Pulled Pork Cheese Fries.


Damn, these were delicious!  I was SHOCKED at how authentic the flavors were.  A little smoke, that familiar BBQ sauce that I so frequently soak my chicken nuggets in, a glaze of velvety cheese whiz, and fresh chopped red onion on top. The fries still had a little bit of crispiness to them, and the meat wasn't all artificial and spongey.  They were so good, that I used an "Instagram filter" for the first time just to add to the hype. (right) The real surprise came when I shared some with my wife (who is pleasantly aware of my intimate relationship with Wendy), and despite her obvious intimidation and jealousy, she agreed that the BBQ cheese fries were quite good.  This just solidified the rousing endorsement that Wendy had done it yet again.  Able to create an affordable, enjoyable dining experience in an industry typically likes to just throw together buzz words and random, low-quality ingredients.  Wendy, you are my shining start yet again.  Well done.

Lay's Do Us A Flavor Pt 4: West Coast Truffle Fries

Up until this point, I've been relying on the blood, sweat, tears, elbow grease, creativity, and culinary expertise of others to complete this pairing masterpiece.  For this last entry, I was confident that my love of food (and familiarity with Truffle Fries) made it possible for me to carry this heavy load all by myself.

First of all, I'm not really sure what qualifies as "West Coast Truffle Fries".  I tried to gleam a little bit of understanding from the commentary from the conceptualist on the bag, but that yielded nothing.

Instead, I decided to simply use the picture on the FRONT of the bag to replicate what I needed.  Aside from the potatoes that I used to hand cut the fries, I had ALL of the ingredients readily available in my pantry to bust out some homemade fries.  Yes, Fat Mike keeps white truffle oil in his pantry. Granted, it's been there for some time because a little bit goes a LONG way, but until you've dressed a really nice Ahi tuna tartar in your own kitchen with some fresh chives and just a HINT of white truffle oil, you'll never truly know why I keep that stuff on hand.  As I've said in the past, Fat Mike loves food.

After Chase Utley decided to slide into Reuben Tejada during Game 3 of the NLDS playoff, I decided to indulge in some late night cooking and chip tasting.  Needless to say, I was a bit aggravated, but that just put me in the zone for some french fry making.  After soaking my potatoes, and a few rounds of frying, these bad boys emerged.

As you can see, they are a fair likeness to the expectation on the bag. The only missing ingredient was the parsley garnish sprinkled on top and that was only because I was too lazy to go grab some from my herb garden at 12m.  Besides, when it came down to it, I was sure that the parsley flavor wasn't going to make or break the chip tasting.  Because I had to fry in batches, the crispiness was reserved to the top layer of fries, and I used those first few bites to set the bar for the chip to follow. Not to do too much horn tooting, but I think I hit the nail on the head with this execution.  A good, deep fry, but not overdone.  A nice amount of truffle oil to keep the fries fragrant, but not overwhelming. And to finish it off, a toss with some salt and a healthy helping of Parmesan cheese.  Delicioso.  The west coast gots nothing on Fat Mike's East Coast Truffle Fries.

Aside from the fact that I figured I could prepare the fries myself, the other reason for leaving this selection for last was because I figured it would be the easiest to execute for Frito-Lay.  As I stated in the SB&G post, the foundation is solid. For crying out loud, how easy is it to replicate a potato based snack with a POTATO CHIP?!?!  At this point, all of the regular readers (hahaha!) should know about my aversion to ridged chips, so I won't go into that.  Besides, I understand that Frito-Lay wants to offer the masses different chip styles with the assortment of flavors. I will say, right out of the gate, that this chip could've easily been served kettle cooked.  The ridged vessel is unnecessary.
And that's all I have to say about that - Forrest Gump 

When the flavor titles were first released, my first thought was that this was a brave choice because if the flavor was well received by the masses, Frito-Lay will be shouldered with mass producing chips with truffle flavoring, which is NOT cheap.  So, I tipped my cap to them for showing the world that they have more money than God, and they're not afraid to spend it.  However, they came up with an ELEGANT solution to that problem.  The chips don't taste like truffle AT ALL!!  It was amazing. I took a chip, ate it, waited, figured I'd missed something, ate another one, waited, rinsed my mouth out with water, ate another one, and waited again, but I never got truffle.  Sure, I got something that tasted like parm and herbs, but not even a false mushroomy attempt at truffle.  I was shocked and disappointed.  Truffle is an elegant and FRAGRANT flavor, and the chips didn't even SMELL like truffle.  This is the closest I've ever felt to being deliberately deceived by Lay's.  This cut deep.  It was hurtful.  All I was left with was a mouth full of disappointment, a bag full of RIDGED chips, and a heart full of sadness.  Thankfully, there was a large batch of homemade truffle fries to wash down the pain.  I felt like a million bucks in the A.M.

Since this is part 4, I'll wrap up with a summary:
No. 1 - Kettle Cooked Gyro - vibrant, delicious and well encompassing of all the flavors found in the Gyro.
No. 2 - Biscuits and Gravy - Better than NOT eating chips
No. 3 - NY Reuben - Unique in conception and rye flavor, but in no way replicant of a Reuben. Still...tastey.
No. 4 - West Coast Truffle Fries - I don't know what it's called, I just know the sound it makes when it LIES!! (if you haven't seen Tropic Thunder, remedy that immediately)

This was a GREAT experience.  Regardless of any lackluster reviews, I will ALWAYS tip my cap to the folks at Frito-Lay for putting themselves out there and taking a chance with consumers.  There's always a "weird" flavor in there that makes them look like weirdos, but I appreciate them for the pioneers that they truly are.  I will never paint Frito-Lay with a broad ugly brush by saying that they're losing their touch.  As A Tribe Called Quest once said, "You get and 'E' for effort, and 'T' for nice try" this year, but I'm sure that feedback like this helps to focus your energies and crank out some real gems for DUAF 2016!! Keep 'em coming, Lay's, you got it going on!

Lay's Do Us A Flavor Pt. 3: Southern Biscuits and Gravy chips

Southern Biscuit and Gravy Chips

What a unique idea for a chip? Actually, when you think about it the most cohesive chip ideas come from a nice, carb-centric base similar to a potato. That way, you already have the starch covered, and then you can focus on the "topping" that will coat the chip and bring out the vibrant, unique flavor you're trying to achieve.  That's why I went into this eat pretty confident of Frito-Lays ability to pull this one off.  The problem is... where do you find authentic Southern Biscuits and Gravy in the NY metro area?? Sure, I could search the InterWeb, or follow recommendations from friends to pay top dollar at a restaurant, but instead I employed the help of a SUPER chef, and long time friend to pull off this tricky pairing.

To your left are homemade "drop biscuits" courtesy of my buddy, "pirate Steve".  He's not an actual pirate, but he is a chef and does occasionally say, "Yar" when the mood strikes. I knew he was the one to approach for this undertaking. I told him what I was doing, and he was happy to accommodate. These bad boys were homemade, soft, delicious, and GORGEOUS. When he brought them over and presented them to me, I couldn't have been happier.  I know they are a slightly different "style" of southern biscuits that are different from the layered kind in the picture, but they are SO scrumtrulescent that they fit the mold perfectly for being representative in capturing the essence of a home cooked southern biscuit.  Then came the follow up punch...

This gravy was amazing.  Thick, creamy, and a little kick of black pepper for spice.  I know that the shot here makes it look overly thick, but I assure you that it draped over the biscuits like a velvet cloak.  Holding onto the natural fats nicely, this southern-style gravy had nice, chunky pieces of sausage and a rich, vibrany flavor that wrapped itself perfectly around the biscuits.  I realized that I had set myself up similarly to the Reuben by finding the ideal representation of Southern Biscuits and Gravy to pair with the Lay's chip.  Nevertheless, it was time.

I'm not sure if Frito-Lay was trying to mimic chicken or sausage gravy, but the pic on the front of the bag had me leaning toward sausage.  When you bit into the traditional dish, you get a gluttonous mix of cream, sausage, spice and fat.  It's divine.  Cutting through all the layers of cream, meat and carbs leaves your taste buds bouncing around from one satisfying taste to another.  However there isn't an overwhelming group of flavors to grab onto.  I became confident that the profile might be simple enough to replicate.

The chip itself is unassuming.  I was impressed at how little "color" there was in the spicing.  I expected to see some black color for the pepper, or some white sprinkle of powder, but for the most part the chip seemed a bit "underdressed". Nevertheless, I had faith and dove right in.

I get what they were trying to do.  As I stated earlier, there's already a solid base to work with around the chip covering that foundation of "biscuit".  Creamy flavors of what I can only imagine was a "repurposed" sour cream flavor were used to cover the creamy aspect of the gravy.  It wasn't so oniony to be a close correlation to the traditional Lay's Sour Cream and Onion chip, but it wasn't far off.  The problem was they forgot the pepper! Any strong chip enthusiast has grabbed the occasional bag of salt & black pepper chips, so I know first hand that there's no fear in having a peppery chip on the market.  In THIS application, that one ingredient was TOTALLY key.  Leaving off the black pepper is a cardinal sin.  I can't understand what made Frito-Lay overlook that spice, or think that this chip could be representative without it? That one ingredient would have elevated this chip from simply being the red-headed step child of the sour cream & onion, to its own functioning and independent chip in the snack-iverse.  It s a real shame that nobody in QA caught that one before it went out the door.  On a scale of 1-10, I'd give this chip about a 5 because it wasn't a fail, but it certainly wasn't a revelation.  Sometimes, it's the little things that get neglected and delate the overall result of the eating experience.  In a head to head battle with an authentic version of Southern biscuits and gravy, this chip just didn't cut it.  Even if it were being used to remind someone of the biscuits and gravy experience, I would say that if you stared at the bag long enough while you were eating it, you could convince yourself that the feeling was there.  If anything, it was a nice side with the dish itself, but by no means could it stand on its own.

In case you were curious... yes... I shared. I wasn't allowed to eat my "special snack" without him.

Does my son eat off a Mickey Mouse glove plate almost every day??
To paraphrase Jack Nicholson, "You're #@!%-damn right he does!!"

Lay's Do Us A Flavor Pt. 2: Kettle Cooked Greektown GYRO

Part 2: Kettle Cooked Greektown GYRO chips

They said that it couldn’t be done.  They said that it was too ambitious.  They said that it was a gross idea.  I have no idea who “they” are, but if they're out there somewhere, I’d like to address them directly with this post: You're CRAZY. It’s been done, folks, and it’s been done well.  

First, of course, allow me to provide a little back-story because it wouldn’t be Faturated Sats without one. 

On the same day that my son and I kicked off this four-part saga with our deli drive, my wife was unfortunately spending her day at work.  Sure, she was curious why we would have driven 30min for lunch, but she knows not to dig too deep with questions attempting to diagnose my ridiculousness.  She came home not feeling so great and didn't have much of an appetite.  The boy and I had been gallivanting all over the place and snacking all day.  Understandably, I wasn’t going to cook a meal if there weren’t a group of appetites to satisfy. As luck would have it, she was in the mood for soup, and one of our favorite places by our house makes a MEAN chicken soup that she really loves. (Where are you going with this, Fat Mike?) 

Because I’m a dutiful and doting husband, I immediately decided that it was my responsibility to get her the soup she loved in order to help her feel better. But when I picked up the phone to place the order,* I realized we were ordering from a Greek restaurant!*  It was soon after that phone call, that this happened:

Having only finished my investigation of the Reuben chips hours before, I went into this eat with a bit of skepticism.  The Reuben experience had taken the wind out of my sails, and I wasn't sure how this next round would turn out.  Last year, Lay's rolled out the Cappuccino flavored chips and the prospect of a Gyro flavored chip seemed to be garnering the same public reaction of, "Ewww... what's that?" The Fat is always willing to take a chance and, believe it or not, I was looking forward to trying these, but after the Reuben experience I found it difficult to believe that the layered flavors in a Gyro could be captured on a chip.  I was happily surprised to be proven wrong.

Think about it: The spiced lamb, the Tzatziki sauce with dill and cucumber, fresh tomatoes, lettuce, red onion, and a soft cooked pita to wrap it all up like a warm blanket.  Mmmm...  Fat Mike loves the Gyro.

I took a couple bites of the Gyro and then followed up with a chomp into a delightfully spiced, kettle cooked chip.  It immediately perked me up, and I almost did the equivalent of a "double-take" looking at the bag in shock.  I reached my hand back in the bag and took another, then another, and then another.  Needless to say, it went on pretty much the same thereafter.  Before I knew it, I was eating more of the chips than I was of the Gyro itself.  My wife looked at me pleasantly and said, "Ah... so THAT'S why you went to the Greek place?"  Thankfully, my mouth was too stuffed with chips to reply.

*disclaimer: It's important to note that all my wife said was that she wanted soup.  I knew I could get away with helping her feel better while executing my shenanigans at the same time.

This was truly impressive.  You can see on the chip the different color combinations that make up the flavor dust.  Similar to a "Cool Ranch" there is a multitude of ingredients that all dance on your taste buds to achieve the artificial sensation of gnawing on a real Gyro.  Fat Mike was re-inspired by this find.  It's true that any kettle cooked chip will have a distinct advantage over the traditional or "ridged" executions, but I think it was the necessary vessel to hold onto the depth of flavor offered with the Gyro chip.  This one has the potential of being a REAL winner in the "innovative flavor" portion of the judging.  But the question is, will it drive revenue if released into the market? Will people be able to overcome their skepticism and take a chance if it wins? Will it be a surprise impulse purchase for chip buyers?  We can only hope that it wins and we find out. 

Lay's Do Us A Flavor Pt. 1: NY Reuben

At long last, the time has come!  Execution of Fat Mike's master plan for the Lay's "Do Us A Flavor" contest has finally completed, so it’s time to get all of you caught up.  As my loyal readers should know (hahaha) I look forward to the Frito Lay “Do Us A Flavor” contest every year, and this year looked to be very promising in terms of unique flavor profiles.  Once word got out about what the flavors were, I concocted an elaborate scheme to properly evaluate the selected flavors   However, anyone out there with a family can understand that "hatching a plan" doesn’t mean that you can just execute it whenever you want, so I appreciate everyone’s patience while I sorted out the “how” and “when” of this ridiculous adventure.  

Basically, the intention has been to not only taste all the new flavors of Lay’s chips in the contest, but to pair them directly with the corresponding foods in order to truly see if the brilliant minds at Lay’s were able to dissect the nuances and ingredients.  These posts are going to be published as a four part series, so keep checking in with the Fat as we run through all the flavor profiles.  Without further ado, I give you part 1: NY Style Reuben Lay’s Potato chips.

To say that the Fat has a distinct bias in this category is an understatement.  As someone who has spent the better part of my life in the NY metro area, I’ve been a fan of the Reuben for as long as I can remember.  To make matters worse, I’ve always had a near authentic version of the sandwich at my fingertips.  So, I’ll put it out there that this is not only a familiar flavor to me, but also one that I hold dear.  So much so, that I was willing to take my 3yr old son on a 30min car ride just to get a Reuben from one of my favorite delis. (see menu here)

As you can see, I was able to grab a near exact likeness to the pic on the bag, and really felt solid about the pairing.  Unfortunately, as excited as I was Lay's NY Reuben flavor fell a little flat for me.  I’ll concede that tackling a layered and complex flavor profile can be a dangerous undertaking, and I wish I could cut them a little slack on this one, but I think this missed the mark.  The lack of focus on the true flavor of a Reuben leads me to believe that the developers cherry picked what they thought were the “primary” flavors in the sandwich and they focused on the wrong things.  I didn't expect miracles, but one has to assume that some of these flavor scientists may have tasted a Reuben for the first time when exploring how to craft this one.

The chip comes off with a strong flavor of rye right off the bat.  Full praise to the Lay’s folks for not only grabbing on that traditional caraway seed flavor, but marrying it perfectly with a little hint of pumpernickel to truly grab the marble rye atop most sandwiches from the best Jewish delis.  I will throw high praise for that.  Nevertheless, underneath that “bread layer” isn’t anything magical.  If anything, the rest of the chip comes off as a glorified Cheddar and Sour Cream flavor.  An unfortunate side effect of the heavy rye taste is that it subtracts from any “brightness” that you’d get from the traditional Cheddar and Sour Cream chip.  If they had been able to focus on building more complex, creamy flavors like the Thousand Island dressing, or even took the brave leap of trying to nail the Sauerkraut flavor, then this chip would have accomplished more.  Aside from the fact that a Reuben is usually dressed with Swiss cheese, which has a very subtle flavor when combined with the other ingredients of the sandwich.  Focusing on the cheese as an ingredient in the first place was the worst mistake.  And while the chip in itself is reasonably flavored, to say that it tastes like a Reuben is a bit of a stretch.  Simply dressing a Cheddar and Sour Cream chip in Rye bread doesn’t cut it.  I’m sorry to say that this was a miss.  It was a valiant effort, but a miss nonetheless.  My battleship was on "J1", Lay’s, and you guessed "B2" on this one.  You were WAY off.  

I will say, however, that the kid didn’t have any issue with the chips at all.

Nice job, little man.  Thanks for taking the journey with me.

'Bos Knows Flava

There are so many new flavors of EVERYTHING rolling out these days that it's hard to keep up!  I don't know whether to credit the developers at Lay's for pioneering the new trend of creating bold, new flavored snack foods and distributing them to the masses, but it appears that everyone is jumping on board and the Fat is LOVING it.  Pringles has 29 flavors floating out there that need to be tried, cookie companies keep cranking out new work, and OF COURSE Lay's keeps busting out the "Do Us A Flavor" competition each year (keep checking Faturated Sats for a full breakdown of the 2015 entries).

In an unexpected twist, however, there is a new comer jumping on the "bold flavor" bandwagon. As I strolled through my local Duane Reade in NYC, I discovered that Combos are now joining the act.

We've all wandered into a gas station or service area over the years and seen the traditional flavors staring at us longingly from the shelves: cheddar cheese cracker/pretzel, pepperoni pizza cracker, pizzeria pretzel, and the delicious Buffalo Blue Cheese.  However, I'm happy to report that earlier this year some new, and (frankly) daring flavors were introduced:

I first encountered 7 Layer Dip tortilla Combos wandering past them during a scramble to grab a stash of snacks for a 3 hour meeting that I was about to attend.  It was pure happenstance that brought me to these, and just reading the flavor title made me curious enough to "impulse grab".  This was an ambitious undertaking because I know 7 layer dip well.  We be friends.  I scoop that nonsense down like nobodies business.  I was overwhelmingly interested in tasting whether Combos were able to capture that glorious taste.  I was worried that bringing to the meeting would hinder my ability to properly evaluate.  However, this bring elicited a strong reaction from the group I was meeting with. Everyone was curious about the flavor, and so I shared in order to able to gauge the group response and really get a chance to evaluate the Bos.

Unfortunately, I can't say that it was a rousing success.  The 7 Layer Dip claim came off more like the Pizza 'Bos without the spice, or the traditional cheese 'Bo with a hint of refried bean. It's a nice share, and the overall group response was positive, but just in an "okay" kind of way. What was missing was the crisp sour cream, or any kind of "fresh-lite" flavor.  I didn't expect miracles, but if you're gonna claim "7 layer dip" you can't just marry a tortilla 'Bo shell and stuff it with a variation on the spicy cheese.  If you come across them during a grab and go, indulge yourself.  Would I chase these down? Nah.  Good try, though.  Next...

Curious having found a new flavor of Combo, I did a little research and found that there were actually 3 new flavors out there.  Since the Internet is a GLORIOUS wealth of information I found that the Combos website has a "product locator" that can tell where any flavor of Combo your craving can be found within a 10m radius.  Awesome.  I did my due diligence, and found plenty of walking distance options to find the newbies.  That brought me to the Caramel Creme Pretzel Combos.

This was great! The perfect marriage of salty and sweet.  Fat Mike is a sucker for a good salted caramel and this one satisfies.  Because of the unevenly distributed filling of Combos, it's tough to get the right balance every time.  Nevertheless, the balance delivers when you get the good ones.  Most people are probably turned off by the idea of "dessert Combos", but this isn't a super savory thing. It's just a nice change to the snack.  If you want a 'Bo that's a little less "bitey" or "cheesy", then this is the way to go.

But the Caramel Creme is the ugly brother to the last of 'em.

WHAT a PLEASANT SURPRISE these turned out to be!! Sweet and Salty Vanilla Frosting Pretzel Combos. Not only do I recommend them, but I shared with some folks and received the exact same overwhelmingly positive response.  Even from some "pickier" folks. This is almost like eating a pretzel Oreo with that refreshing vanilla creme.  It's a brave flavor to put out there because some people can understand the salted caramel ones, but the two flavors just seem to juxtaposed to work out.  Aside from the fact that the amount of vanilla creme really needs to balance to pull this of..

 

Good stuff, Combos.  I'm hoping this one sticks around for a long time because I see PLENTY of circumstances in the future when I'll be actively seeking these out at a random gas station stop, or late night wander past a place that I know carries these.  I HIGHLY recommend that you folks out there check these out for yourselves.  The Fat tips his cap to the folks in the 'Bos offices.  Good thinking, and good execution.