A Three Flavored Sendoff

This is LOOONG overdue, but better late than never.  In my defense, it's been a bit busy these days and I haven't been setting aside enough time to keep updating about some of the new eats. You'll be happy to hear, however, that I think I'm getting back on track so keep checking in at Faturated Sats to find out what's on the menu these days. :-)

The big news these days is that I recently relocated back to my hometown, in my home STATE of NJ. That's right, folks, Fat Mike is now posting from the dirty jerz!  Before my move, however, I was given a gift from one of my buddies.  He was walking through his local supermarket and made an INCREDIBLE discovery that he was pleasant enough to share with the Fat.

Banana Creme, Strawberry, and Chocolate Creme Twinkies

Do not adjust your screen settings.  Those are REALLY 3 NEW FLAVORS of Twinkies that you're looking at.  I can't believe that it's taken this long, but it's finally happened!  I was overjoyed. Immediately, I knew what needed to be done.

(from left to right) Tradiitonal, Banana Creme, Chocolate, and Strawberry

In order to ensure balance in the tasting, a box of traditional Twinkies was purchased to round out the whole experience (hence the number above).  At that point, I was able to site down and do a thorough eat to see whether the new Hostess was able to pull off this magical, multi-flavored feet.

I'll tell ya, this was a delicious undertaking.  Anyone who knows the Fat knows that he LOVES Twinkies, and I was very happy with what the Apollo Global Management and C. Dean Metropoulous & Co. have done with the new Hostess.  After tasting all 3, the banana definitely stood ahead of the rest.  Obviously, personal taste factors into these things and I am admittedly a banana enthusiast.  However, others that joined in the fun agreed with my evaluation.  What can I say? Some people are chocolate people, and those folks picked accordingly.  I'm not gonna fault them for their loyalty. In the Fat's humble opinion, however, there should be NO question that the greatest success can be found in the banana.  The biggest loser was the strawberry, without at doubt.  It wasn't just that the flavor seemed too artificial (even for being piped into a yellow snack cake), but that there was an "off-pudding" textural issue that was apparent to me and other eaters.

Do you see those deeper reds in the picture?  Weird, and noticeable.  It served as a stark reminder that you are eating artificial, processed food that is not of this Earth.  That's not something that an eater needs while trying to gorge on something like a Twinkie. Each bite of a Twinkie is divine, and shouldn't be marred by reminders of what it takes to achieve that magic.  This was an unfortunate side-effect of imagination, but it certainly didn't take away from the experience as a whole because the only thing better than having a Twinkie, is having a multitude of Twinkie flavors to choose from.
But it didn't end there...

Banana Creme (on left), Chocolate Creme

And so, the two were combined to create "The Banana Chocolate Twinkie!!  Obviously, I didn't have the time or the inclination to open all the Twinkies to ensure that I found the ones with the most ample amount of creme filling.  However, I had enough confidence that the consistency of the process had stayed true after the company changed hands.  A perfect mix could only be achieved with proper knife skills, so I divided and CONQUERED! I was very happy with the end result.

Being able to actually see the blend of banana and chocolate was a point of pride.  Regardless, I swear this was an experience that I had been waiting for since childhood.  I imagine this is what Unicorn turds taste like.  It brought me back to my first Carvel soft serve experience when I bit the bullet and ordered the swirl ice cream, and then realized that things only got better when you mixed two good things together.

If you are a Twinkie enthusiast, like I am, then I highly recommend trying the new flavors.  If you're NOT, then I highly recommend trying the new flavors because the options are intriguing.  You're no longer constrained to craving a traditional vanilla Twinkie if the mood doesn't strike.  Grab a few new ones, mix, match, double down, gorge, and enjoy.  Well done, new Hostess.  Keep 'em coming.  Fat Mike's flavor suggestions include:  coconut, key lime, cheesecake, and cookies 'n' cream.  Mmmmm